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Read more: 148. The middle of the middle148. The middle of the middle
There’s a particular kind of humility that comes from being assigned seat 28E. The middle. The mathematical centre of other people’s discomfort, for thirteen hours, from Los Angeles to Aotearoa. To my right: a woman whose body had simply outgrown the architecture around it (and the bones buried within it). Her flesh pressed warmly against…
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70. Nourishment not punishment.
Read more: 70. Nourishment not punishment.I have a friend in her eighties who say’s she never remarried because she was looking for ‘nourishment not punishment’. It’s a turn of phrase that came quickly to me when I was lying on my bed after a sauna, contemplating another carrot, apple and celery juice for dinner. My sixth juice dinner. Sixth. That’s…
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69. The greedy bitch
Read more: 69. The greedy bitchSo I’m staring at a golden ceiling, the birds are chirping, the river below is travelling through, Arvid the Indian bodyworks healer has my head in his hands and is lengthening my neck with commitment, and Jeff Buckley is singing Halleluyah on the stereo. That. Just. Happened. This man is the magic of the retreat,…
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68. Suspended reality.
Read more: 68. Suspended reality.Day four. I can feel myself lightening. I feel less connected to the ground somehow, though no less connected to the earth. Took the rental car into town for the morning, walked on the beach barefoot. Talked to my kids on the phone. People looked normal, going about their days, long weekend, swim in the…
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67. Too much information?
Read more: 67. Too much information?It’s day three and I feel peculiar but not hungry. And the peculiar is in my head more than anywhere else. I am cast adrift from the rhythm of my normal life – the loving preparation of food, the meal table chat, the pleasure of it all. I miss that more than I miss the…
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66. I suspect Nelson was briefed.
Read more: 66. I suspect Nelson was briefed.We just went for a one and a half hour walk into town for a break from the compound. Followed the rules. Turned left.
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65. House Arrest
Read more: 65. House ArrestI wonder if it’s all part of making me let go. There’s no cellphone reception at the Retreat so to make contact with the outside world you have to use their landline. This morning I think I was on the phone too long, and was promptly given a PIN number for future use. I weakly…
Secret Royalty On Tour 